Twenty-five years ago, I was on my way from London to Los Angeles to finish a twelve month assignment. I planned a brief layover in Boston to visit my fiancé. Our reunion did not go as planned. Less than a day after landing, he called it quits. After his announcement, he refused to interact with me, left our church, and temporarily disappeared from my life. His decision ushered me into a pitch-black, and seemingly inescapable tomb.
That might sound dramatic but we had been together for more than two years and I felt a sense of surety that God himself had orchestrated our relationship. The finality of the break-up caused a tsunami of doubt and grief. Had I spiritualized my longings? How had I failed him? Walls of pain closed in on me. I wept—the heaving, snot flowing kind of weeping—more that summer than I had during all of my previous years.
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http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/strange-goodness-good-friday