I distinctly remember the first time I had the courage to ask an African American friend if he thought I was a racist. As we sat around the table, there was a long silence as he gathered the strength and grace to respond. When the word yes emerged from his lips, I started to cry because I knew he was right. It was a moment of conviction and I am grateful for his willingness to speak that truth to me. It is not a word to use lightly—I could hear him out because there was sufficient trust between us. But, as Dr. McNeil explains, if we refuse to use it when the circumstances call for it (or when someone asks!), we do everyone a disservice, especially those who do not have power.
I also remember a day more recently when I was walking out of a business and all of the white employees were harping about why blacks needed to get over the Trayvon Martin verdict and stop accusing whites of racism. I hesitated and then continued out the door. After watching this video and seeing Selma, I’d like a do over. I hope that the next time I am presented with such an obvious example of racism, I will have the courage and the humility to speak up. (Though that probably would not have been a good moment to bring the word racism into the conversation, I certainly could have offered an alternate perspective.)
This four minute video by Dr. McNeil is pithy, accurate and super helpful. I was moved and convicted by several of her points. Please give it a listen and then leave a comment.
Dr. Brenda Salter McNeil is an Associate Professor of Reconciliation Studies in the School of Theology at Seattle Pacific University, where she also directs the Reconciliation Studies Minor program. Dr. Brenda is also an author, speaker and thought leader with over 25 years of ministry experience in the field of racial, ethnic and gender reconciliation. Her mission is to inspire and equip young Christian leaders to practice reconciliation around the world and to build communities that partner with God to bring relational healing and social wholeness. You can follow her on Twitter (@RevDocBrenda), Facebook, or find more of her work on her website. I hear from reliable sources she’s an amazing speaker!
To check out other posts from the series, click on January 2015.
Thanks for sharing this, Dorothy. It is helpful in a practical way. I particularly found helpful the part about creating your space and being clear about what you will accept in that space, as well as the part about when it is appropriate to use the actual word racist.
I agree Melody. that was super helpful for me and I hope I have the courage to speak up next time I’m in a situation when folks are saying things that are inappropriate.