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Americans love options. We love being able to choose between Voxer or FaceTime, Lyft or Uber, Bumble or Tinder. Having many options allows us to feel like we have some modicum of control in our lives. Apart from occasionally encouraging over-consumption (particularly at Trader Joes), there seems to be no disadvantage to living in a culture with plentiful options.

But what happens in those circumstances when our alliance to Christ limits our options?

Like when a relative asks to borrow money (Matthew 5:42), when we see our ideological enemy stuck on the side of the road with a flat tire (Luke 10:25-37) or when we feel chronically unhappy in our marriage but cannot blame that misery on any egregious behavior (i.e., addiction, abuse, or infidelity)? How do we respond when we have many choices—but only one real option?

I have a number of divorced friends whose marriages failed because their spouses resisted transformation and refused to engage. If that describes you or if you are married to an unfaithful or abusive spouse, I am not addressing your situation. I am speaking to married couples who are currently struggling with what they perceive to be generic incompatibility issues and who imagine divorce might solve their problems.

To read the remainder of this article, please click this link to Relevant Magazine.

Stock photo courtesy of Relevant Magazine.

To read more about my book, Making Marriage Beautiful, click this link.

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